Men, we have a lot of things to know when it comes to our women: What to say, what not to say, whether to wear socks in the bed, remember to open doors, calling to tell them we are thinking about them, making life easier for them, supporting and even knowing how to make the bed in the morning. All these things must constantly be running through your mind on any given day. Then, to know that there is a whole other topic that you probably never even danced across your cerebral cortex. This is the reason why I am here to help you out, men. I am giving you this advice from experience. So take it and make some deposits into the love bank with your mate.
Natural is not just a Hairstyle, it’s a Lifestyle. When you enter into a relationship with a woman who is already natural you have a bit of an easier time. So I will get back to you gentlemen later. For the men who are going to endure the “Big Chop”, the best advice I have for you is, “BE PREPARED”. Here are a few tips that may work for you:
1. Take down any extra mirrors in your home. Now we know there are places that need mirrors such as the bathroom, review mirrors in your car and so forth, but that decorative mirror near the front door, and even that full length mirror in the guest bathroom. This is a big change for them and they don’t need to constantly compare their new look to their last.
2. Compliment other parts of their body! Women don’t want you to always tell them their hair looks good or fine because they are going to think you are just saying it because you want them to feel better. Now this may be true, but you can’t let them in on that secret. Now do not be an idiot. Compliment the right body parts: eyes, smile, legs, and gracefulness. Let’s leave out T&A.
3. Have tissues in key areas of the house! Bathroom, living room and next to the bed are places where she will have time to stop and think about the choice she made. There needs to be tissue because there will be tears.
This is a big step for women and they are going to be self-conscious about it until that morning where they can successfully pull off a decent twist out. So men be patient.
Now men who have entered relationships with women are already natural. You have a different plight, but not at all easier. Natural women, first, are proud of their hair and they will use every excuse in the world to iterate that fact. So be prepared for frequent and lengthy conversations about twist outs, braid outs, trims, YouTube Hair Bloggers and hair products. Speaking of products, men do not be alarmed when you go into the bathroom and you look on the vanity. You may find yourself being taken over by a barrage of hair products overflowing from the cabinets. Milk, eggs, mayonnaise, apple cider vinegar, coconut oil and other common kitchen items may be found in your bathroom.
I remember the first time I came home and saw what I call the “warning signs”:
I opened my door to a strong smell of vinegar emanating from my bedroom. I had no idea what was going on as I opened the door hearing the YouTube Blogger, LongHairDontCare2011 , which I would come to be very familiar with. As I walked in my bathroom, I see my better half with a brown cream mask on her face that is turning white, a sink full of hair products, 90s R&B playing in the background, a hooded dryer set up and a computer on the counter with the blogger showing her how to twist and set her hair. I slowly backed out of the restroom and got in my car and spent the next 8 hours with my best friend. Yes, I said 8 hours that is a common day for a wash, deep condition, and braid.
Men, I do not tell you these things to scare you, just to prepare you for what you are going to encounter. With this knowledge under your belt you are a step ahead of the game. You get to be the boyfriend or husband that women talk to her friends about, telling them “He just understands how I feel about my hair” or “He is so patient and he loves my hair”. Sir, this is the time when you can start taking withdraws from those love deposits you put in the bank earlier. Get your favorite meals, watch the movie you wanted to see instead of the Romantic Comedy that was just like the last romantic comedy that was just set in a different city and get that extra attention when it comes to intimacy. Men go out with this knowledge and be successful!
– David Linson II